I'm Still Alive
What's been going on with work, family health, and more over the past few months.
As some of you know, it’s been a transition period for my family and me. I no longer work at One Hope Church in the Benson neighborhood. I’m grateful for how many people have reached out to encourage, support, and listen to me. So much so that I had to stop meeting and connecting with people because I was tapped out mentally and emotionally. However, I also stopped because I wanted to focus on my new job and make sure my family is doing well amidst the transition. In this post I will briefly encapsulate all that’s happened. Many have asked how they can best support my family, and I’ll share how you can at the end of this. In subsequent weeks I’ll write more details about the recent intersections of my own life, family, work, and faith.
In this post:
Leaving One Hope
Family Health
Coaching
How You Can Help
Leaving One Hope
I was not planning on leaving my role with One Hope. I was closing in on three years working there, and it had been a good fit. I enjoyed most of my work since it focused on people and the community. However, as many people know, employment can change in the blink of an eye. Rarely is it ideal timing.
On July 30, I met with Jamison and Raquel Horton to discuss a potential new role. I was informed that my full-time role would be reduced to part-time. My salary would be reduced 25% as well. They wanted this to be resolved by September. I didn’t understand or expect this, and asked if there was something I had done to cause this. I was told no, that there is a great appreciation for who I am and all I do. This was a decision made by leadership to position the church for where they wanted to go. My role would be reduced, and two new positions would be added (an Executive Pastor/Director role and an Office Manager role).
The next few days were hard to process this because the severe storm hit the area the following day. I would reach out personally to over 75 families and individuals connected with One Hope to make sure they were okay and see if they needed anything. I had multiple, ongoing conversations happening via text, phone, email, social media, and more. I was helping people out as best I could while trying to figure out my own future.
Jana and I decided I should turn down the part-time role and put in my two weeks resignation notice. My last day would be Thursday, August 22nd. My hope was to have a clean exit and finish well. While the storm response was taking a lot of time and energy, I still had the Rose Hill Elementary Back To School Party, on August 15th, I was helping coordinate. I wanted that to be a success, and it was. Proud to have been the point person and be involved with that partnership.
The situation with my resignation is never easy which is why I asked one of the governing board members to be present when I talked with my boys about it. When I resigned from Christ Community Church (megachurch in Omaha, NE) I had to respond to rumors after the fact that I had been fired. Thankfully, I didn’t sign an NDA then (or now) so I could respond when people inquired about my “firing”. My boys were younger then and wouldn’t necessarily hear anything from people. They are seven years older now. They understand things better than they once did, especially my high schoolers. They know a lot of people at the church. They would hear things or be asked questions. Because of this, I wanted them to hear from someone in church leadership their perspective on the matter. I wanted them to hear from someone in the know that there were no issues with me, no moral failing, that I had not been fired, that I had done my job well and people were appreciative of me. I am grateful for Mario Alejandre sharing with my boys.
I want nothing but the best for One Hope.
Family Health
Two days before his first day of middle school, Charlie fractured three bones in his right foot. The following week we took Liam to see his pediatrician for a cough that wouldn’t go away. It would be the first of many appointments.
Liam’s cough turned into pneumonia. Then he had an “episode” during a cross country practice where he was hyperventilating and experienced tetany. In subsequent appointments with his pediatrician and specialists we found out that Liam has “vocal cord dysfunction” (VCD). It’s a condition that affects endurance athletes. Basically, Liam doesn’t get enough oxygen when running because his vocal cords are not working properly.
Some Murphy Boys health details:
Between August, September, and October, Liam was prescribed four different medications, underwent a breathing treatment, and started using an inhaler.
In September and October alone, Liam had 10 medical appointments, 5 PT appointments, and 1 trip to Children’s Urgent Care.
Charlie was in a walking boot for eight weeks.
Gideon would develop “atypical pneumonia”.
Going back to Liam, I couldn’t have been prouder of how he responded. He went into his senior season with a goal of medaling at the State XC Championship. He practiced hard and smart throughout the summer, and was in position to have a great season. Then it all went sideways with his health. At one point I wasn’t sure he would run again in the season, but he managed to recover and qualify for State XC. More importantly, his attitude was positive throughout the ordeal. While he didn’t medal at State XC, his senior year has been memorable. He was recognized as an AP Scholar with Distinction, a Questbridge National Match Finalist, and crowned Homecoming King. His health is now the best it has been in nearly a year.
One nice thing with working part-time during this season is I was able to run Liam (and his brothers) to all their various appointments. Speaking of part-time…
Coaching
Earlier this year, I was watching a movie with my family when I decided to get my coaching certificate from the Nebraska Department of Education. I had no idea what might happen.
I had been involved with Burke’s cross country program for three seasons at this point. I had been running since 2018, running 5Ks and a marathon. Other high schools are getting young coaches with Olympic trials pedigree, while I’m in my forties trying to keep pace. I had to tell myself not to self-select out. I reminded myself that I am good with people, that I am good with students.
Throughout the spring I worked on receiving my Special Services/Coaching certificate. I didn’t think there would be any issue with my work at One Hope because nearly everyone there has another job or side hustle.
Once I was certified I had no idea where to start beyond reaching out to Steve Satterly, the Burke Cross Country Head Coach. Again, I had to tell myself not to self-select out.
I wrote Coach Satterly and thanked him for letting me be involved with the program the previous three seasons. I added that it was a reason for me to pursue a coaching certificate, which I now had. Some may say I should have been bolder, but I was worried about my boys’ standing within the team. Plus, Coach Satterly has been fantastic with Liam and Duncan and I did not want to jeopardize that at all. I did not have an expectation that I should be a coach.
The response was positive. “We may have an opening for you to coach. Let’s talk.”
And thus my fourth year with Burke’s cross country program I’m officially an assistant coach. I can’t stress enough how much joy it brought me over the past few months. There were days over the past few months where life seemed upside down, but showing up to practice brought stability and hope.
(I have a second Substack where I write about Burke cross country if you are interested in learning more. I talk about the team, post videos I shoot and edit together, and share some of my own experiences.)
Jana is now a full-time resource paraprofessional with Omaha Public Schools at Beveridge Middle School. Last year she had been a substitute para at different OPS elementary schools, but went full-time once things changed with my work.
How You Can Help
When the school year started we were driving a 2002 minivan and a 2007 minivan. Both needed repairs on them to keep them running smoothly. Every time we did a repair on the 2002 minivan we wondered if it was worth it to keep sinking money into it. However, we weren’t in a place financially where we could afford a newer car or car payment. So, we kept putting money into the 2002 minivan.
This fall we noticed the 2002 minivan running sluggishly and making all sorts of sounds that are not comforting. Jana and I were both worried every time Liam drove it to school or work, even more so when others were in the minivan with him.
When we returned from the State XC Championship in Kearney the 2002 minivan had a flat tire. If we kept it through the winter it was going to need new tires. It was going to need more repairs as well. We decided to get rid of it.
We are back down to one vehicle and we are asking for help to get a second vehicle. Our hope is to get a newer minivan that is reliable for years to come.
We have a setup a GoFundMe page where we’d like to raise a minimum of $10,000 to put toward a down payment on a minivan. Anything we raise above that would be put toward the minivan payment or current minivan expenses. (We just spent nearly $2000 replacing the battery, alternator, and more on our 2007 minivan. It’s winter ready.)
With everything going on this fall, and not wanting to take away from the coaching opportunity, I did not pursue a second or full-time job. Now, there is the cycle of needing a second vehicle to get to a second job, but needing additional money to pay toward a second vehicle. Your generosity will help us. If you can’t give financially, your prayers are greatly appreciated.
Click here to donate on the GoFundMe page.
Thank you for reading. I hope to reach back out to a number of you personally.
Hey Robert. Great authenticity in this post. Thank you. I Really enjoyed reading it. Praying for God's provision for a new van and healing for the boys.. May you sense Jesus walking closely with you and your family in this time.